sistren dedication.

common traits:
from conversation to conversation one thing remains consistant. we all have our issues. women and men.specifically i'm speaking on my fellow sistren.wombangodisnot that queen title...save that term for theenglish as they like to call their women whores.so yeah.

over the years i've had many conversations withvarious women about similiar or non similiar interests. specifically lesbian women. maybe it's my need to know and need to analyze er got damn thang. but i've been wanting to get to the top of this for some time.

let's see: there's the she must be lesbian cause something must've happened with her daddy.or the not so great molestation stories many ofus seem to share. then there's the plain olejust wasn't presented with a choice.

this is mad informal so pardon me as my thoughtsmay seem jumbled and out of context. bare with me.

2 different conversations with 2 different women at once..neither of which knew of one another..but profoundly enough both talked about the sameexact thing at that same exact time. coincidence.no there are none.
i've found that as women we have a large amount of weight we are carrying around.. built upanger, hurt, frustration, pain, happiness, apathyand so on.....most of it carried over fromchildhood into adulthood and look at her now...
she's all fucked up mentally.
i'm fucked up mentallyher..
fucked up mentally.
internal self hate starts to attach itself like leeches to your center. next thing..your consumed in everything except for the right thing.self right..being what you need at that given momentto rid yourself of all those supressed fears and thoughts you've accumalated.

truth is..many of us don't realize how fargone we are. we don't look at ourselves seriously.i mean like seriously looking at yourself. i'm saying this as if it's an easy task...nah aint shit easy in life cept for some ass.

i've found myself in tears and wasn't sure asto why. many nights i've wondered why i havethis issue and that one..and why i've surpressed myself for so long....inside my own issues.where did the surpressing start? what triggered it?will i ever unlearn this behavior?

will i ever be free inside my own head? or willi always remain a slave to my carnal surpressed thoughts?
experience shapes us. they say the more u go through the stronger person you will become. shiiiid...i should be hercules then. but i'm not.all i know is i feel like i'm so fucked up on the inside....and most of it had little todo with me. but more to do with what happened as a child.

**it all starts at home. wondering what my fam would've done if i'd told them what really went downwith ccousin ray and i. would they have told me to "keep it on the hush"?

this brings to mind a question...one i've often wondered. why would a family insist on keepingsuch a tragic thing under raps? who suffers from this?i'll tell you who.....
she does.
she does
i do
you do
her children suffer
her childrens children
her
womb an

suffering = DUKKA
life is suffering.
pain and love are one in the same.that fine line of insanity. we walk these miles daily with hopes of someday beingas free as we can be. or as much as the government allows.lol. i mean we all know we not really free....right?

battered
abused
tortured souls
whores
tricks
raped

just a few of the many ills we women have sufferedand try to overcome. but many fall short but stillmanaged to pass the side affects on down through totheir siblings ar children.
*sighs.

*****i'm tired and i can't really write no more..so i'mma stop this here and and on as i see fit. cause my head hurts and i'm not in the best of moods or spirits.

sorry i'm on some carl thomas *emotional right now.
*dedicated to my sistren*

domain...looking

so i'm domain shopping.
who has info on good domains ...space that can host me! i got mad traffic so i need a nice place to call home.

thanks.

SURFACE FRONTS: EXPERIMENT WITH STYLE/DECEPTION

"TRUTH IS FROM THE INSIDE OUT,WE HAVE BEEN TRYING TO HEAL WITH SUPERFICIAL SURFACE FRONTS,DON'T GET CAUGHT UP IN THINKING THAT I AM NOT QUOTE UNQUOTE CONCIUOS. THAT I DO NOT LIKE TO EXPERIMENT WITH STYLE,THAT'S DECEPTION! TRUTH IF FROM THE INSIDE OUT! GO NICE WEAVE...DO YA THANG... "SHOOT ME CAUSE I WEAR WEAVE WHILE I GROW MY NATURAL!"

ummm, wtf? you know i'm bout to kill this right? you know your wrong for it....i just so happenedi was encouraged by a friendto visit your spot and i saw thisfor the 1st time....ummm.....lol

this is like seeing T.D. Jakes on 35 riding in the back of a Rolls Royce. WTF?

one thing has nothing to do with the other.

the fuck is the purpose of naturally growingyour hair but placing a wig on top? growth stunt if you ask me...and serious identity issues..a lack of self KNOWLEDGE. trying to exist between 2 different worlds...you can't.

your either dead or alive. good or bad.but not both simultaneously. maybe one or theother but not both at one time. impossible.

but

you are entitled to be you. but first figureout who the you is....without jumping onevery cool thing you see. natty afro on tuesday and silken asian weaveon thursday. screams I KNOW NOT OF SELF!

sorry: it's not about switching styles...thisis moreso about switching personalities to suit the IN crowds you drift among. your image of self IS DRIVEN BY OTHERS IMAGE OF YOU!

"stop to think what your doing"

this isn't a diss..i repeat not a diss. i'm "just keepin it real"

energy:create:fear

funny how life is sometimes. just when you thought everything was okay. your suddenly wrong. and everything you want to do has been done by someone somewhere..the idea. or ideas. or is it simply energy transforming and metamorphing(making words up) itself into becoming...it/whatever/everything?

we are energy, we can not be created or destroyed, we just change form

creativity. the blessing given by the creator. it is our duty to create some thing. that is the way of giving back. we are talented for a reason. whether we acknowledge it or not is yet another task. have you been creative today, yesterday or other day? any day?

"one door closes another door opens". this is truth. not looking past/back at what mistakes...but will use those as guides=insight=wisdom. we are all guided by something...which side are you on? we were born naked..only to be sheltered with layers later used to hide/bury.

fear. balance as means of existing behind so many layers upon layers. stifling yet crippling itself deeper into your normal routine, you realize your trapped. in fear.by fear for fear self. fear god. fear life. fear death. fear happiness. the positive in that? if there is one. erase fear. unlearn. the hardest type learning there is. undo not needed cycles/patterns/negative trends. oh that goes for friends too. undo. no hard feel. it has to come to this.


enuff of that. my eyes are crossed,
tossed slossed laid to the side....
ha! meaning: i'm sleepy.
i should be in bed. dreaming. of [u]. ?who? stop! [u]

music rant coming soon!!!!!

"shame on a nigga"

...who tried to run game on a nigga,
wu, ill fuck yo ass up"

R.I.P.
to one of the grimiest, stankin ass, gold teef havin
shit stained drawls, welfare check scheming, 15 children ass
havin, burnt dick gonnnooreeeh patient ass niggas to date!

ol' dirty was a true original spirit..and he will be missed.
at least by me.

your in your final resting place sun.....no worries.

BLACK MAN IS GOD!!!!!

UBIQUITY || NEW | SA-RA CREATIVE PARTNERS | REWIND 4

*** PLEASE REPOST & HELP SPREAD THE WORD ABOUT INDIE MUSIC / ARTISTS (Thx - The Ubiquity Crew)



The Rhythm of Life - November 11, 2004




IN THIS NEWSLETTER:

1. NEW: SA-RA CREATIVE PARTNERS - DOUBLE DUTCH 12"
2. VOTE FOR SA-RA: PICK YOUR FAVORITE TUNE ON BBC
3. NEW: V/A- REWIND! 4 12"
4. AS ONE - OUT OF THE DARKNESS CD/DLP
5. JEREMY ELLIS 12"
6. PLATINUM PIED PIPERS 12"
7. THE BREAKESTRA 12"

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


"Ubiquity supply two of the best Records of the Year (I shidt you not)!"
PICCADILLY RECORDS


"Ubiquity is untouchable right now!"
DOMU


"One of the Labels of the Year"
GILLES PETERSON (BBC / RADIO 1)


“I'm placing my money on Ubiquity taking away 'Best Label' at this years Worldwide awards!”
FRANCINE HAYFRON (PRODUCER | HOT POT SHOW FEAT. MR. SCRUFF & TREVA WHATEVA)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


(1): SA-RA CREATIVE PARTNERS - DOUBLE DUTCH 12"


http://www.ubiquityrecords.com/mpeg/ur162_01.mp3 - Double Dutch (Co Co Pops)
http://www.ubiquityrecords.com/mpeg/ur162_02.mp3 - Instrumental
http://www.ubiquityrecords.com/mpeg/ur162_03.mp3 - Hangin’ By a String
http://www.ubiquityrecords.com/mpeg/ur162_04.mp3 - Death of a Star
http://www.ubiquityrecords.com/mpeg/ur162_05.mp3 - Instrumental
http://www.ubiquityrecords.com/mpeg/ur162_06.mp3 - Space Theme


* Upcoming features in Flaunt, Dazed & Confused, as well as gracing the cover of the Winter Issue of Straight No Chaser Magazine.


"SA-RA is my shit right now! That’s all I’m listening to!”
KANYE WEST


"Next level music - SA-RA is the future"
ERYKAH BADU


"I'm a big fan of SA-RA... you got yourself a monster!"
RHETTMATIC (BEAT JUNKIES)


"One of the most anticipated new releases of the year - some next level tackle here....this four track EP will find favour with fans of Outkast, Madlib, P-Funk, Disco and anyone into the cutting edge of modern music. That means you."
FAT CITY RECORDS


"Record of The Week.. Do Not Miss! If you like the Outkast style, quirky end of hip hop, you're gonna love this!"
PICCADILLY RECORDS


"SA-RA is a bi-coastal, 3-man production team who have somehow managed to blend the raw un-quantized feel of Jay Dee production with the freak appeal of Funkadelic for a sound that is entirely their own...this is some real significant shit."
TURNTABLE LAB


This is the first all exclusive Ubiquity single from the super hot US production trio responsible for material by the likes of Common, Jill Scott, Erykah Badu, Pharoahe Monche, Bilal, Dr. Dre, Jurassic 5, and many more. Pronounced "Sah-Rah", Om'Mas Keith, Taz Arnold, and Shafiq Husayn comprise the partnership and their name translates to "the off-spring of the most powerful energy in the universe". These are children of the cosmos, ready to blast you with their magical mystical soul.

“Double Dutch” is a mid-tempo banger with male, female and vocoder’d vox, combined with Neptunes style crunchy beats that blur the lines between hip-hop, soul and dance music. “Death of A Star” sees the trio drop into 80s roller-skating territory that would make Prince quite jealous, features another vocal and a hook you’ll be humming for days. Both sides end with a bonus mad instrumental track for the DJs and heads. Meanwhile, the "Sa-Ra Space Theme" with its jazzy hip-hop instrumental feel will appeal to fans of Madlib's Yesterdays New Quintet project, while "Hanging By A String" with its raw gritty bangin beats will have Jay Dee fans taking notice. Something for everyone!


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


VOTE FOR SA-RA: PICK YOUR FAVORITE TUNE ON BBC RADIO 1'S ONECLICK


Three of BBC / Radio 1's specialist DJs including Worldwide's Gilles Peterson supplied their round-up of tomorrow's tunes today. Amongst the five songs selected was SA-RA Creative Partner's blazing tune "Double Dutch" along with "Booty (La La)" from our good friends Bugz in the Attic.

Votes will be counted until November 14, 2004. To vote for the track you like best, Click Here:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio1/oneclick/recordbox/



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(3): VARIOUS ARTISTS - REWIND! 4 12"

http://www.ubiquityrecords.com/mpeg/ur161_01.mp3 - Rebirth 'Evil Vibrations' (Mighty Ryeders / De La Soul)
http://www.ubiquityrecords.com/mpeg/ur161_02.mp3 - PPP 'The Look of Love' (Burt Bacharach / Hal David)
http://www.ubiquityrecords.com/mpeg/ur161_03.mp3 - Yam Who? 'The Star of A Story’ (Heatwave)


* Heavy Radio Airplay on BBC / Radio 1 (Gilles Peterson & Benji B), KCRW, and lots more.


"The Rebirth's cover of 'Evil Vibrations' will be the Chocolate City anthem for the next few months!
GARTH TRINIDAD (LA, KCRW 'CHOCOLATE CITY')


”Rebirth have smashed it with this double cover...and PPP get ill on their vocoder thang...just awsome...Ubiquity is untouchable right now...”
DOMU


"Amazing.... I have been playing these cuts off cdr for a loong time"
KING BRITT (FIVESIX RECORDINGS)


”Fantastic! Absolutely adore the covers of Evil Vibrations and The Star Of The Story. Great idea, great tributes!”
RAINER TRÜBY (TRÜBY TRIO)


This exclusive sneak preview of the forthcoming Rewind series features LA based The Rebirth, Detroit’s Platinum Pied Pipers and UK remix kings Yam Who? Between them they cover “Evil Vibrations” originally by the Mighty Ryeders (and sampled famously by De La Soul), The Burt Bacharach and Hal David classic “The Look of Love” and disco fave “The Star of A Story” originally by Heatwave respectively. All tracks are exclusive to Rewind, none will be featured on the artists upcoming albums!


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


(4): AS ONE - OUT OF THE DARKNESS (CD/DLP) URCD/LP158

FOR FANS OF: Jazzanova, Carl Craig, Recloose, Boards of Canada


Massive Radio Play from the likes of Gilles peterson’s “Worldwide", Benji B’s “Deviation”, Patrick Forge’s “Cosmic Jam”, Nick Luscombe’s “Flo-Motion”, Ninja Tune’s “Solid Steel Radio Show”, and added to rotation on over 50 radio stations in the US.


"A blend of the vintage and the cutting edge... Degiorgio seamlessly integrated his love of funk and jazz with relentlessly futuristic sounds"
XLR8R


"Reflects his refound interest in American soul and hip hop... Ubiquity is holding down some serious material at the moment."
STRAIGHT NO CHASER (TRANSATLANTIC AUDIO)


“A force to reckon with in hip-hop and dance”
MIAMI NEW TIMES


"Degiorgio has combined his immense production skills with the sweetest soul music to create an exceptional piece of work"
TRUST THE DJ



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------



(5): JEREMY ELLIS - LOTUS BLOOMS 12"

FOR FANS OF: Metro Area, Recloose, Jazzanova, Carl Craig


“Collaborating with the likes of John Arnold and Amp Fiddler, and counting Jazzanova and Gilles Peterson among his fans, Ayro is the Detroit soul man of the moment!”
FLAVORPILL.COM


“The Jeremy Ellis shit is butterfunk and latin soul that makes me smile. Waiting for more of Ayro’s genius.”
J. BOOGIE (OM)


"Awesome soulful vibes....this definitely stays in the CD case for a good while.”
DAZ-I-KUE (BUGZ IN THE ATTIC)


”Bananas!”
MONKONE (WAX POETICS)


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


(6): PLATINUM PIED PIPERS - STAY WITH ME 12"

FOR FANS OF: Jay Dee, Slum Village, Jill Scott, Dwele, Erykah Badu


"The light has come on, forget Talib Kweli, Jill Scott and Raphael Saddiq the hot shit this fall is PPP... " - GAMALL AWAD (RUDE MOVEMENTS, NYC)


"If you're at all a fan of Detroit artists like Slum Village, Jay Dee and Dwele, or just quality soul music in general, do not pass this release up!"
- DJ LANGUAGE (TURNTABLE LAB, THE FADER, NEGRO CLASH, NYC)


"This is honest to God real soul music" - XLR8R


"One of the most talked about artists of the year has been Waajeed and his Platinum Pied Pipers project... blending Detroit hip hop style with 21st Century soul flavor." - FATBEATS.COM


"Waajeed and Saadiq continue the form that has made the Bling47 label an essential for fans of the Jay Dee / Slum Village dirty, hip hop soul vibe...Booming, ruff beats with ragged around the edges soul quality are what this sound is all about." -KEEP ON



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


(7): BREAKESTRA - DON'T NEED A DANCE 12" (& LIMITED 7")

FOR FANS OF: ANTIBALAS, GREYBOY ALLSTARS, QUANTIC SOUL ORCHESTRA, CUT CHEMIST, THE ROOTS


“I sampled that shit myself! The first time I heard their cuts, I didn’t know it wasn’t recorded in 1972!”
?UESTLOVE (THE ROOTS)


“Ridiculous groove from top to bottom – they’ve got their shit down tight!”
MARK DE CLIVE LOWE


"Keep the breaks coming! seriously feeling the breakdown and the extra drum track. More please!"
J. BOOGIE (OM RECORDS)


”Nugget of funk right off the scale. No parking on the dancefloor!”
DJ MAGAZINE

my adidas vs. my white tee [YEP!]

2 ponder....

i recall the first time i heard run dmc's my adidas. i'm thinking "this is a great song". plus i was beginning to like sneakers while coming to terms with my relaxed comfortable self. there was nothing greater than a hip hop song that celebrated one of my fav brands of sneaks. i also remember the intensity heads had for that song each time it was played at concerts, school dances and house/block parties. it was a celebration of our own culture..hip hop.

hip hop over the years has had many material elements that have sorta defined it or been attached to as symbols. take the turntables, b-boys/b-girls, fat laces, sneakers, track jackets, sagging over sized clothing, truck jewlery, bandanas, gazelles to ray bans to gucci shades, all the way till now...the white tee. all symbols used or worn by listeners and followers of the culture.

the dynamics of the 2:

"with no shoe strings in em, i did not win em" <-- my adidas quote
"i bling in my white tee, serve fiends in my white tee" <--- my white tee quote.

a question was asked what is/was the difference of the two?..i replied "not a damn thing, same shit diff time" but of course those of us who are elite in our music tastes see no similarities of the two. if you ask me your blind! it's blatant and exact. i see both songs as a celebration of a material product used to describe the culture in that day and time.

now i'm not speaking lyrical content before you reply about how wack my white tee lyrics are or how wack the beat is....please. use your mind to travel beyond and really see that there is a similarity. HISTORY WILL ALWAYS RECYCLE ITSELF! that is the inevitable. this isn't 1986 but 2004 and i see my white tee as i saw my adidas then and now..both songs are about why they like these things, what they do in them and how they wear them...actually, each song made me appreciate both items. but hey, i'm well rounded in my musical tastes so i'm able to step outside to see the similarities. *snicker*

lol! it was said that my white tee was big up'n a criminal nature..lol wtf? funny because cats around my way have been wearing white tees for many years. even my father wears white tee's he's not a criminal or thug. i think there's more here than we'd care to say as well. i believe it to be an overall dislike for certain styles of music from certain areas of the counrty. dare i say it...southern music. i've debated countless people when it comes to topics concerning southern artists, music and hatred we receive from various parts of the world.

if the question posed is one of "what's the diff in the two songs"..then you should list the differences...not "oh them dimwits is wack" or "the beat is wack" or "the backdrop one note keyboard is stupid"....duh!!! that's not a difference..that's a dislike for that product. the original question posed was a very good one. well at least that what i thought. and i'm not ashamed to say that run dmc contrary to what u may think...were not the greatest mc's alive. they are celebrated because of the barriers and hurdles they overcame for the sake of hip hop. although they are my peeps...they were NOT lyrical gods...sorry. neither are dem franchize boys. but this wasn't about lyrics.

i'm really surprised this is the first song to actually celebrate the white tee. it's all good though. this did make for a great debate topic.

however, i'll continue to wear my white tee and adidas...while brushing yall haters off. lol


thanks clash_sic for such a cool topic to ponder.

the new danger: the re-issue

for thos who didn't know...mos def's the new danger will be reissued. so if you don't have the original copy you may be too late.

it would appear that geffen mos's label had a huge problem with one of the new danger's tracks "the rape over." strong song one of which he's been performing for more that 3 years with black jack johnson. it talks or points out record companies raping artists, watering down conepts of truth...mos licks shots at the record executive.."quasi-homosexuals running this shit"...lol mos you a fool man!

actually skimming okayplayer i learned of a recent show in cali "an evening with mos def". where mos actually took the stage but he talked only about his life and answered questions. no music. no rapping. just dialouge. gotta love that! well i'm sure most wanted to hear the songs they all love...personally i would've enjoyed the verbage a lot more. and excerpt of what happened:

MOS DEF SAID....

he will not be in the rap game for too much longer....there are more things that he wants to do with his life....he still likes the music....but his life is different now....

his reason for doing the NEW DANGER....with a different vibe compared to his Black on Both Sides is because he is older and at a different stage of his life.......when he did black on both sides..he was 23 years old...he was younger.....and that is where he was at......as he put it.....from day one....his music was "fuck you.....if you dont like it.....imma do me"

can't beat that....besides there comes a time when we all will have to grow up sooner or later. big up mos.

seen but not heard

::lawnmower citizen::



::b-gyrl'n(@ladyfest)::



::turn my headphones up(lol!)::




i am constantly @ work or practice.
an obsession for b&w photos....

sa-ra? who? & the likes-of-comparisons

this time i'm thinking i better cut and paste...then save what i write.. after completing a story of sorts...blogger lost it! bitches!

so theres this buzz about a group of producers..the buzz has been going around for sometime now. pretty much of the summer i should say. who's this buzz concerning??? sa-ra or srcp respectively. three producers fresh out the funk/soul era or vibe.

as of late i've read numerous opinions on these cats and their music. of course the haters come in droves but there seems to be a good folowing of appreciators..i hate using the word fan..it seems to lessen the liking for the artists craft. it sorta mirrors it down to stalkish actually..lol.

i read someone's opinion..said that they weren't so great. they were rip offs of parliament era. hmmm. i think everyone is influenced by something or someone. upon listening to anything sa-ra you'll definitely hear some of their influences...i don't know maybe it's me but i hear more of cameo, sly stone and others. it seems as if anytime an artist creates something soulful yet abstract people wanna lump them in the same cateogory as pfunk.

or this one i love...make unecessary comparisons to outkast. lol. as if to say outkast started some shit. no. they've recycled what was to create what is known now. "everything u did has already been done" thanks lauryn for that. and it's true. as much as i love kast...i am first to say that sa-ra sounds nothing like them. or shouldn't even be compared.

we should all just enjoy music and leave the real critiquing to those who know music.
babies!!! go to bed. pick up the what music is guide for dummies too.



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
determined.

i am determined to create.
find a place for unsigned
artists to be seen and
most importantly
HEARD!!!

anyone?

to the anonymous comment leavers

START leaving your names please this is annoying to me. It is hella unfair that your reading my thoughts and getting insight as to who i am.....but u leave me
with

NOTHING.

and 99.9% of the time anonymous has GREAT things to say.
fuck that hide'n-go-seek shit.

SHOW FACE.

who's responsible for this?

Anonymous said...
delusions- A false belief strongly held in spite of
invalidating evidence. addiction-being abnormally tolerant to and dependent on
something/someone that is phsychologically habit forming. compulsive
psyschological need for and use of/socially harmful.delusions + addiction = not
love, possible love for drama.

Midwifery in Progress: Selfishness and Meditation

i'm tired. tired of limits, restraints, liars, bougie niggas, inflated egos, diluted christians and their fantasy mindset, those who play with change and growth, also those who claim the want to find their spiritual center.....your all fakers. and you know what happens to fakers right?.....

for some reason on any given occasion these spirits seek people like me/us out for friendship. it's all good..i'm open to much. and i can put up with a great deal. until u try to pass off your bullshit on me as if it's real and i wouldn't/couldnt tell the damn difference. i'm smarter than that. although i've had one, two at the most slip on through and fool a sis.....lol but in time all bullshit shows face. disguised. when this happens......embrace. embrace who and what u were from jump...don't pretend to be what u can't be or who u aren't. just be u. be the best fucking u that u can. eventually you'll get acceptance from some place or another.

oh yeah....energy burners. those who seek out energetic individuals to compensate for your lack of......your stressing me! upgrade your spiritual center! come clean. get real. not with us/me but with u. your not knowing who you are is ruining others. it's ok to be. don't act or try to be what you aren't..i love you just as u are...the problem starts. when your bullshit pours over on other souls......misguided souls. let your inner devil free!! and focus on the god/godis in u. find MA'AT in all things.....not sure what MA'AT is....i'll teach you or at least show you where to find her. she's within believe that....

to those lost...and those souls know whom i speak of...let me midwife your search for self. i have experience with this and references. reach out i'm only one highway/email/phone call/train ride/2-way/dove mail away....

now i don't claim to be a being of perfection because that don't exist in my world....i've been guilty of all of these things i've mentioned. i lived these experiences and learned from them. that was then....now. i take my learned experiences and speak on them. write about them. share them in hope that they'll help others. cleansing. oh yeah i'm real about mine....i can face ME in the mirror on the daily.....can you? i sleep good at night...do you?

peace...my brother peace this peace that......peace is overrated! niggas have run peace to the ground and beyond. do you know what peace is?

bottom line....we as people are more concerned with ourselves than the next. we are so enthralled with me me me we kill others with our selfishness. we lose the best things this way. but we chase bullshit by the dozens in our white tees and prada shoes.......what else is there? there should be more to life..more to your life. unless your simply defined by your own bullshit. if this is you......and you see no other way...as if your trapped there or you think your karma has led you there to stay........this blogs for you baby! see me on that midwifing thing. there's only so much time left on this crazy earth.......get FREE niggas now!

*THE ROOT OF ALL SINS IS SELFISHNESS*... remember that!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

meditation*
a serious practice....should be taken very seriously...if you have a mentor..use them....when starting out a mentor is necessary. someone with experience to teach about the different travel points that you should experience..also the different lights you could possibly experience.

complex simplicity: teedra moses

i'm feeling this teedra moses joint....

"this is more than just a silly crush...i wonder if u notice me.....u gotta feel
me"
"all alone at night i arbhor feelings for you, holdin my pillow
tight...sometimes, i even touch my seeelf."

i'm digging her voice a lot. i can relate to a lot of her material...i haven't felt much r&b stuff that's come out in a few years....but teedra makes me relive what i miss...
i read a few reviews because i wanted to know more about this lady. i've seen a few say she's similiar to cherelle....

hmmm. she does have that circa 1985 feel. not just another pretty face..there's talent there.
she writes her own shit...i'm loving her for that.....
big up teedra.

teedra

no comparisons i'm just str8 feeling this/her music.

yo. mali check her out i think you'd like her music....plus she from the N. O. say she went to St. Joan of Arc school...hmmm lol

expression and buble tea

that's just it!.....commenting on a comment made in regards to me
expressiong myself........without my pen.....sometimes my thoughts
leave my lips only to have knowone understand them. my verbalization skills
kill at times of need. i find myself at a loss for words when i really need them...

but i'm never without words when i have a pen in hand..or handy.
my pen makes my expression seem so easy and free. well i do free myself with words
but they have been my means of escape as well. i've hidden behind them
for a while. make me mad and i'll write a letter...lol well that was then...
these days i find that i'm more verbal than ever...which in some cases can be good...
but
there are times when silence...takes over. and i can't control my need to just
be quiet.....lately...i've been dealing with some issues that i felt i needed to verbalize
my feelings....unfortunately, in certain cases i was unable.....well that only makes me
want to lash out and tear shit up. when i feel as if y backs against the wall....i get
bouts of hysterical blindness and i just start reacting to things.....

i'd much rather express....as i have years upon years of shit on the inside.....
just dying to be set


f r e e!

all i want is to rid these things buried so deep......

so und reas on ing r i g h t/ l e f t br ai n


oh....and bubble tea is some nasty shit!!!! i don't know what the attraction is...
but ummm..i wasn't feeling that foamy milk like mess....lol sorry..lol
your on your own on that one....but the sushi.......YEP!

yall ever had bubble tea????

tell me what do u think of this?

"where do we learn to
appreciate/value/respect/cultivate what we HAVE and not to always want more, or
at least something different...hmmm i'm wondering. it is so UnAmerican to be
happy with what you got.. we gotta get with the marketing department's
mandate...get the '05..the new hotness... and we bring that to a
relationship...we dont appreciate what we have-and what we dont have...different
is always better...as a result, we've gotten away from the lessons of our
elders..."

progression, obsession & misconception

ahh...now this feels a hell of a lot better. i'm working out the kinks in this thing.
i guess it only took a little patience.

welcome to my side of the world through my eyes as i see it!
you may not agree with all that's expressed here but your welcome.....
take your shoes off before entering my thoughts. we're all sitting in the lotus position allowing our energies to connect. flow. it increases your heart rate...good for the blood stream.

i'm fresh off an emotional journey through like and love...that fine line.
sometimes you get burned. but i'm the number one fire sign and i'm drawn to fire. so i play with it..i'm getting used to it. i swam the pisces water...lol. drifting on a memory....yeah yeah.
washed out! but all things drift back a shore. wading. you find this offensive..oh well, you'll get over it! as i'm sure you love u the same. life is dukka(suffering) but we must pick up all pieces and keep it moving. elevation. liberation = freedom.

i'd like to thank all those before and after for taking me through valuable lessons. i've laughed, cried, kicked and screamed. but i've learned through it all who i am. thank you for that. you served your purpose in my series of events. forever or a season...right?

i've learned. learned to love ME. first and ask questions later. if
well seasons change.....and we're about to enter fall. thank you summer. u gave me clarity.
growth.

centered. i'm awakened by the sweet memories of what the future holds.

to you: u. yeah u.....what can i say....i love u more each day...each time you open your mouth to speak..you provide a certain old wisdom. u give me understanding and truth. we've been there before....and i wouldn't have to think twice if there were EVER another chance.....* by chance could we......lol. ok i tried. i know that you wish to be in other places...and that is respected. u are all i ever needed in a sol being. be you. don't compromise that for nothing. clear your space of unwanted idoltry...it only slows u down. this move was meant and needed. <--- by now u should know that i'm talking u. lol godis. the ori ginal

....to the deciever. thank you too. i see past the green eyes to the truth. your soul cries out and it speaks years of wanting to break....free. we all find ourselves here at some point. next time try the direct approach for those who are direct with you. these are the ones you want to keep closest. throw away the pimp card it only makes your purse heavy. lol beneath it all i admire many qualities you possess. empress....at work.

lessons in life. respect them all..learn from each.

dammit i am a serial writer...but never biter.
back on my stroll........................................oooooohhhh i need some NEW shoes bitches....

peace!

this moment of clarity..reliving my cycles

*disclaimer* brought to u in part by a clear sound mind..free of any emotional irrational behaviors* this is well thought out.....GO!....lol

is there a such thing as clarity as it involves u and another?the way i see it...there's this fine line of what you think you deserveand what you actually receive....i mean it's a very FINE line.

i'm thinking if i give out positiveness, love and all that...i should get that in return from the universe. but in some circumstances it's thosein which u admire or adore most who simply....shit on u when that moment of clarity is needed.

u know the dreadful:

"i ain't go to tell u shit" or "u can't have the answers u want, so let it be"

yeah those....and normally these repsonses follow a series of before events.like lies, deceit(sp?) things of that nature. i always thought that if i put outpositive i'll somehow receive that. if it's in my realtionship with family or my partner. i would get that back. right? that's part of the karma process...right?

i figured if i wanted or needed an explanation that i could surely receive that...
as i did/would/have provided u with such
instead when my needs are out front....they're not respected or treated with care...this is where i start to feel...............u get shitted on(here's that phrase again)

i've created a cycle.

old feelings..new feelings...past, present and future. my past mistakes i begin thinking of them...my patterns..the people i chose to letin...i question me. but sometimes it's not me. but i always question numero uno.

figured this time would be different as i explained my previous patterns and thingsthat have happened in my life...but it makes no difference when it comes down towhat a person needs or wants.... but in my attempts to become one i leave room for chances at least 2.(well depending on the nature of the hurt)
the 3 strikes rule..all part of my unconditional self i plan to master.

selfishness(this is another topic, another day)

which brings me to....

NEEDS vs. WANTS

ahhh which comes first? is what we want always good for us before what we need?will the need last longer than the want? is it ok to want/need both at the same time?or is this a matter of convience? availabilty?

hmmm
these r the things i ponder.

i am an instrument. and i was played. game recognize game. thanks amp!

did u know? and other stuff

who knew? did you know? i knew......
unfortunately i haven't heard.....but as always i keep my ears to the ground
listening and waiting for sounds.....or the sound.
fertile ground. is back with another studio album....Black Is...

i've alreadu heard great things about this release as it came out on Aug. 24th.
hopefully all of the lucky people who got the chance to see them perform
gave rave reviews....i've got to get out of dallas...as i miss all the cool shit!

for those wanting to find out where to purchase.....
dusty always has it going down....but of course stop by black out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

in other things, rants, raves and questions....
i know i'm not the only one who was wondering what the hell happened to
lauryn hill's appearence at the vma's....lol yeah after waiting around..hoping to see
my sista in musicdom....to no avail. they played the shit outta me! lol who else is mad?

ummm kanye...lol
dude...pull ya own dick out cha mouth son. your not that great of a rapper...
your ok with the production...he's feeling himself too hard man....it's almost scary how much.

nobody wants to see ll cool j rap anymore man...jeez dude you've had your run.
let the youngins take it man....stop licking your lips..it's not hot!

i wanted more DAVE CHAPELLE but i understand the circumstances...so i support dave on his
decision.

other than that.....i'm hating on the shole shit just because i wasn't in MIAMI! ....dammit.
lol

work in progress..please don't HATE!!

ooooh..i apologize for that last display...that
horrendous background image i used before...blinded the shit out each of you....

i'm figuring out some things with this photoshop cs...watch out bitches...i'll start doing my own site nshyt...
u wouldn't wanna.......


nevertheless, i'm testing things out...seeing what works and what doesn't.
i still am unable to figure out what the hell happened with my links....

i've got to get these ads removed as well...

this is a work in progress....

back to my photoshop tutorials....

the misconception of perception - what is and what was.....

"don't judge a book by it's cover" is the old saying."is every nigga with dreads
for the cause, is every nigga wit gold for the fall", "naw so don't get caught
up in appearence"

these are words of truth and wisdom... not saying they arefrom a profound intellect. for some reason (we) are under the impression that all wise thoughts and words have to come from a certified PhD. intellect. no not true. truth comes from and out ofexperience. with that I am a master teacher of hard times and misconceptions...as many of you are. i may dress a particular way. with my ass hangin out, breast showing andwith the over greased legs...but does that imply that i am not of the knowing ofwho i really am? just because i wear my pants a little saggy, sneakers everydayaccompanied by a tee....does that make me the poster stereotypical butch bitch?if i decided to loc my hair, wear dashiki's, sport an anhk whether in hand or around my neckdoes that make me the boho champion rasta dread???

humans are caught up! trapped even in a particular method of thinking.we are stereotypical people who feel the need to generalize in order to understand....but why not question? if knowledge is gained throughwisdom and understanding wouldn't questioning be a part of that process?we tend to label things without properly knowingwhat they are...inquire about them first. we've created misconceptions and we areaccepting of them. in fact for some they are life's mantras.

yeah, i know you know at least one person i'm speaking about....umm hmm him/hernext time tell that ass to shut up unless they are with the knowing that not all things are alike. we are all born individual and original...most answers comefrom within. stop to think. stop to listen. stop. look. listen. misconception of people are used daily as means of attack. protect your own from this deadly force. force yourself to understand what, where and why thisperson is who/what they are. unlearn what has been taught to you....or passed downand passed off as tradition.

::loneliness:: a matter of perception

"those who fear loniless and silence scare me"

silence is needed and it's golden
it's only natural to feel lonely. but it's just that. a feeling. being led by an emotion. the question to ask is.....are you able to separate the two?(emotions from feelings) do you know and understand what is fantasy and what is reality?have you only succomb to being a victim trapped in your own mental hell? it is my belief that most are trapped between these two realms...straddling the fence even

have you had your daily dose of realism today? or is everything in yourlife seen through rose colored glasses? look around you. realize what is.and what your part in the big sceme of things to come. acceptance. no, one's own. not acceptance from below.being comfortable with oneself is almost the absolute keys to lovingthe skin your in.

deliverance through released energies..spiritual, mental, sexual...sometimes help, but often provide hazed illusions(also known as fanatasies) of what thingsare to be. when one hasn't become [whole].

whole. inner outer upper lower. 360. four corners. ma'at. nirvana. completion. who reaches completion. those who are finished.

ascension. someday you'll meet [her].

some crunk bullshit.

and the god's said: spread forth your wings towards higher. send forth to those not.
i accepted and i proceeded to rock.
verses full non rehearsed or rehashed like on & on badu.
huh, what! yeah i used her name too.
the difference in i, yo i only spit truth.
from the top of my dome to beneath my feet
walking in rhythm. inticed by southern drums
always on beat. gold teeth and cadillacs
sit ins and fat sacks, from texas to south cacalac


ok..lol this is funny. this is my rendition of that crunk shit! lol...yeah right!
i was bored so i decided to write empty lyrics on this blog.
i rarely use this thing...I hate it!. i don't like the layout. can't get it to work right!
i am over this............................................

ummm LIL BOOSIE....
"i smoke, i drank
i'm supposed to stop but i can't
i'm a dog
i love hoes, i'm addicted to money cars and clothes"

for some reason i LOVE this song...it's the beat. gotta be the beat...GOT DAMMIT Louisiana got that FYAH....shiat up mali....lol i dont need ya lil new orleans cosignature...lol *

i'm working on getting my site together..thanks. in due time....
YO afeni holla at me.
uh huh i see u.......................

the cosby rant: (finally right?)

i waited a while before i responded here to this.
i know that a few of you were asking and wondering my thoughts
regarding were...well here goes:

so yeah i'm a little perturbed at "the cos"
right now. i'm confused and also saddened by the way his comments were voiced. i know what some of you are going to say...that you think he's right. or that his words were justified and true. justified i can't verify but there was a validity of truth in what he had to say. where i begin to have issues is with the lack of care and precaution he showed while making these accusations. the state of the black family is in fact at jeopardy. we are going through tough times where the mind has to be a fundamental tool used in your everyday in's and outs.

however, with that said it still doesn't excuse the fact that mr. cosby chose to relieve his frustrations in front a full tv camera crew.. instead of...the B.E.T. awards..or any other random gathering full of black people. if in fact these statements are directed and geared towards "the lower class"...take that shit to the lower class hoods and preach this message. but there has to be a follow up of sorts. you can't just preach or beat your message into people's minds without positive reinforcement.
to those of you saying.."ah well, i think bill is right" and "he gives millions of dollars to clark and spelman" FUCK you! negroes attending claark and spelman are not the one's he's blasting off against. it's the POOR. those of us who make less than $50k a year. i know i fall into this bracket..how about you? i don't appreciate the blasphemy...especially when you not my struggle to maintain. i'm educated and i speak the language of the streets..i speak that language because my people tend to understand it. it provides common ground..a level field for us to meet. 10% negroes need to close their mouth's, go back to playing golf or something.

i feel strongly about this as i've chosen early on to voice for the poor. i don't agree with how mr. cosby voiced his concerns "they can't read or write" they're laughing and giggling, and they're going nowhere"....ahh yeah. i'm not impressed. are you that pressed in your life that you have to command the stage with these negative words. yep i said negative because i believe that he's directing them in a negative light. take your fucking shades off old man...face us.

what about the lack of care and attention YOUR generation did'nt show mine. how many times has your grandma noticed a child going the wrong route but never stopped to tell that child that he or she should straighten up? hmmmm think about this one.
that lack of care has directly resulted to what we are now..but has he spoken of this. has he spoken of the government issued programs in the 70's to so call help blacks to prosper, but all it really did was provide jobs for blacks to move out the hood only to NEVER look back. truth is there are some who'll always live in a low income area.

i say if indeed education is bill
s answer....put your millions to building the first hood nigga college..maybe then "those people" will see the importance of what your saying.
otherwise it's all jibberish from a talented 10th perspective.


please, leave honest feedback only. bullshit will not be tolerated.

peace and love to all.

(yes, i have a very serious side)

[ether]ian 9 ~ melanin spirituals

9 ether
infinite
natty chemicals
mystic

tele kinetic
kmt
wisdom
through
reflection

creates

u
i
me
he
she

all the pieces of the puzzle seem to fit.

no coincidence.

we r meant to be
melanin


.::peace::.
(4 anonymous(icu))

[slowly] surely.....from the collection ((swipe))

ooooh i'd forgotten what music felt like. i'd forgotten that warm feeling of satisfaction that you get while playing r&b. no, not that ashanti power 105 bullshit you hear all the time. i mean true buttery, feel good to your finger tips soul. ummm, like warm lotion on yo back, damn - now that feels good! thanks bilal for that...

so i'm revisiting who is jill scott after vowing sometime ago to never listen to the cd again. i'm saying that because, i played that cd till i needed to purchase another. who cares this feels good...jill does that.something. lil thing.hmm.yeah that. her feeling is quite reminiscent of that feeling i got after hearing minnie riperton for the 1st time...ummm...she does that. i love that.

insight me to chorus....

i'm interested in seeing how well this music will age. pop that shit in at age 36 and see if i still feel that same vibe. confirmation.


have you visited my space lately?

2004 Black Enterprise Top 10 Cities for Blacks

2004 Black Enterprise Top 10 Cities for Blacks

1) Atlanta, GA
2) Washington, DC
3) Dallas, TX
4) Nashville, TN
5) Houston, TX
6) Charlotte, NC
7) Birmingham, AL
8) Memphis, TN
9) Columbus, OH
10)Baltimore, MD
..............................
% of College Graduates (Black)

Atlanta, GA
21.9

Washington, DC
24.1

Dallas, TX
18.5

Nashville, TN
18.9

Houston, TX
18.4

Charlotte, NC
16.5

Birmingham, AL
14.6

Memphis, TN
12.1

Columbus, OH
15.4

Baltimore, MD
16.1
............................

Avg. House Price / Avg. Rent

Atlanta, GA
227k / $751

Washington, Dc
355k / $1,974

Dallas, TX
203k / $902

Nashville, TN
187k / $717

Houston, TX
179k / $749

Charlotte, NC
213k / $566

Birmingham, AL
204k / $623

Memphis, TN
183k / $638

Columbus, OH
253k / $663

Baltimore, MD
207k / $645


So which one of these cities do you live in?

Doing It With R. Kelly

Stripping the sexiness right out of sex
Doing It With R. Kelly
by Ta-Nehisi Coates
June 15th, 2004 5:00 PM


Kelly: a preference for the pornographic over the erotic
(photo: Reisig & Taylor)


. Kelly has always been the wrong man for pillow talk. Crass and crude, a Kelly anthem is the anti-Viagra. The man has pipes on loan from God and a gift for crafting melody. He is also, unquestionably, the most significant r&b artist of his era. But with songs like "I Like the Crotch on You," he has drained the sexiness out of sex like no man ever before. A serenade from Chicago's finest is the ultimate buzz-kill—a cold-shower delivered in perfect pitch and melody. Kelly's perspective on sex always sounded like it was culled from the dirty jokes scrawled on the walls of a middle-school restroom.

So it should come as no surprise that a man with a juvenile view of sex has so often been accused of having sex with juveniles. Kelly will be facing his most damaging accusations starting June 26, when his trial for child pornography begins. According to prosecutors, Kelly videotaped himself having sex with his 14-year-old goddaughter.

Despite a much publicized airing of the video, Kelly has used the most effective tool at his disposal to revamp his image—a barrage of hits. It helps that most of those cuts are the sort of vague, toothless odes ("Heaven, I Need A Hug") your grandmother could love. Yet no honest fan who's given a Kelly album an honest listen can hide from one essential fact: In matters of love and sex, Kelly never got out of the ninth grade.

For the record, all men have an R. Kelly in them. No matter how noble and nice, we've all caught ourselves peeking over the line, admiring a body beyond its years, and murmuring about the perks of the 19th century. So when Kelly confesses, "My mind is telling me 'no,' but my body is telling me 'yes,'" he is peering into all of our souls. Among the healthy male populace, moments like these last about 30 seconds. Then we recoil, straighten up, and return from our lower selves.

But Kelly, as an artist at least, lives in his lower self. There was never anything seductive or suggestive about an R. Kelly jam—when a cut is titled "Feelin’ On Yo Bootie," "Like a Real Freak," or "The Best Sex Ever," the guesswork is eliminated. Kelly's many hits were based not just on a penchant for melody, but on an unrivaled ability to reduce sex and love to its basest and most graphic terms. For Kelly, sex is only interesting when stripped of all inference, allusion, or double entendre. To leave anything to the imagination would be to leave something behind.

When Kelly does attempt to be poetic, somehow he ends up sounding like a naughty schoolboy. Take his monster hit "You Remind Me of Something," in which he struggles for a metaphor to describe his lover. His efforts fall slightly short of Shakespeare. "You remind me of my jeep, I wanna ride it/Something like my sound, I wanna pump it/Girl, you look just like my cars, I wanna wax it/And something like my bank account, I wanna spend it, baby." Shall I compare thee to an SUV? Thou art more fuel-efficient and, um, roomier.

At least "You Remind Me" was an attempt at a nontraditional metaphor. The title cut from Kelly's breakout album 12 Play, is reminiscent of the sort of dirty nursery rhymes exchanged by third graders: "8, Feel me, I'm so hard/ 9, See I want you from behind, with that bump and grind/10, Baby climb on top of me/11, Up and down we'll go, you'll see." Those sorts of sweet nothings may not conjure memories of Cyrano de Bergerac, but they certainly get the 12-year-olds giggling—they don't call it "12 Play" for nothing.

Many of Kelly's fans turned their backs when he was accused of wooing children, but some of Kelly’s best material sounds engineered to do precisely that. The chorus for "It Seems Like You're Ready" always reminded me of some high school senior trying to con a freshman into going past first base. "It seems like you're ready (seems like you're ready)/Girl, are you ready, to go all the way?"

It is Kelly's juvenile taste, his preference for the pornographic over the erotic, that marks the dividing line between him and his forebears. As a kid, I was never sure what "Footsteps In the Dark" or "Voyage to Atlantis" meant. But my three-year-old son could get the gist of "12 Play." Furthermore, while you could always count on Curtis Mayfield, Jeffrey Osborne, or even Al B. Sure to lend you a hand in your efforts at seduction, Kelly's hand—even pre-child porn charges—always seemed to be wielding a camcorder. You just can't escape the feeling that Kelly's watching you, which might not be so bad, if he weren't offering color commentary too.

But Kelly can't even let the generational line stand—even his elders must be reduced to schoolkids. When not penning prom-night monologues, Kelly has done some impressive work with Ronald Isley, transforming the balladeer from a lion in winter into a relevant hit-maker. Isley, of course, has had to pay a price. His lyrics have been dumbed down to Kelly's level and he's had to stomach his new role as poster boy for the cuckolded gangster. From "Down Low" to "Contagious" to "Showdown," Kelly has crafted a melodramatic musical epic using Isley's mate as the thread. The Isley/Kelly marriage is a natural musically, but the resulting content has been vintage R. Kelly—which is to say audio porn.

How can a guy with such a puerile view of love and sex become the bard of his generation? Well, it helps that Kelly isn't the only one dumbing us down and fixing on the lowest common denominator. The Farrelly Brothers, ODB, Paris Hilton, and John Ashcroft have all made their contributions in the war against privacy. Inference is dead. Speak to us like 10-year-olds, or we will not understand. This is a world that R. Kelly was made to serenade, one perfectly designed for his callow approach to the lyrical.

Of course, that leaves us old fogies and hopeless romantics out of the loop. I like to think that I'm a freak. But a cantillating R. Kelly consistently leaves me determined to redouble my efforts at Bible study, even his recent innocuous incarnation would sully the listener. "Step In the Name of Love" is masterful bit of whitewashing, but makes me itch—and not in a good way. I know which way Kelly is stepping. I'm doing my best to walk the other way.

Juneteenth

june 19th will mark 139 years
since slaves in texas heard about
the emancipation proclamation and
were set
free...

give thanks for this day
all melanin beings...

we pourin libations for our ancestors

i really shouldn't be working today......

note* all slaves were freed but majority were...remember dred scott!!

what the miseducation??? commenting on comments. VL. 1

everything here is a thought/work in progress.
the last post that I made was in reference to comments
that i'd received regarding some events that badu's hosting
here in dallas....majority of the comments received
were negative....so I(meaning EYE) decided to write about
those comments and my opinions regarding....

that's just it....my opinion.

if for some reason you tend to not find what your
looking for within this url....send me an email..maybe
i can be of some assistance. if for other reasons you
find that my comments or statements have "lack of infomation", maybe don't suit your tastes or uninspiring...lol, why you can surely see your way OUT!

now, constructive criticism is always appreciated...
but that ole negative ish..WILL NOT BE TOLERATED.
friend or not. did you even read my disclaimer....
pardon whatever's going thru your mind but not all life
revolves around you or your thoughts.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
in response to the other comments: i'm really unsure
as where to get info on badu's non-profit ventures...
lol i'd try that email address listed or her website for that intro. peace

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i agree with Rich, shit is all the same no matter the
city or state. you see the same people if your a regular.
that tends to burn anybody out after a while. i also think
badu is a great performer, but as i've said before....
i lack an understanding of who and what she is...
at times i can't relate...through songwriting is how
i relate to certain artists....i haven't been able to follow
her for a long time...does this mean i'm not checking
for badu...no, just means i couldn't relate this last album
to anything in my life to understand it....

ok i'm done....this is dead!

DEAD!

"My patience is better, but my tolerance of lower spirts lack"

normally i like to post past conversations that i may have had thru email, notes and various other media streams.

why do i post these? not sure other than it's just another way of letting readers into my thoughts, life and cypher. so here goes another....

** disclaimer**
in no way, shape or form by posting this am i trying to be negative. this is strictly about sharing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

3 SURPRISE EVENTS : ERYKAH, DEAD PREZ, PRINCE, + More"

Wanna get involved or help spread the word?
Erykah Badu presents 3 nights of old fashion summertime fun! That's right, 3
SURPRISE events benefiting B.L.I.N.D., Badu's non-profit, and the Forest
Theater Development Project.
PEACE * LOVE * MUSIC
***************************************************

Monday, June, 7th, 2004 Erykah Badu Presents: Motion Sickness Monday Hosted
by Talib Kweli
W/ Special Guest Performances by:
Hydroponic Sound System
Bavu Blakes
Strange Fruit Project
D-Madness Six-2
Special performance of "the Blast, PT.2" featuring Erykah Badu
Doors at 7pm, show starts at 8pm 21+ $10, 18+ $12 at the door ID's Required,
Free Parking

******************************************! *********
Wednesday, June, 9th, 2004 Erykah Badu Presents:
Jam Sessions III FEATURING: Dead Prez, Erykah Badu, Musiq Soul Child
W/ Special Guest Performances by: Nayrok (Badu's sister),
Common Folk And rock group Monsters and Dust
Doors at 7pm, show starts at 8pm $20.00
General Admission, 18+
Tickets at the door or: 214-421-0677 ID's Required, Free Parking

***************************************************
Friday, June,11th, 2004 Erykah Badu Presents: Musicology :
"The Official Prince Tour Afterparty"
Hosted by: Erykah Badu W/ Special Guest Performances by:
A Surprise DJ and a Live Jam Session Doors at 7pm,
show starts at 8pm $20.00
General Admission 21 and over only!
ID's Required, Free Parking

***************************************************
The Black Forest Theater 1920 Martin Luther King Blvd.
(MLK & 45) Dallas, Texas 75215 214-421-0677
www.blackforesttheater.com

Produced BY: B.L.I.N.D. & Smitty INK, LTD
levatino@smitytink.com

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
reply 1:
and don't send me no more wack emails about(badu) with her no hosting azz self, lol


reply 2:
You know, I'm starting to dread attending functions like this. It's sad that my hometown has lost my interest. I run into the same crowds/personalities. If it were held somewhere else I might be a little more excited. I have soo moved on. My patience is better but my tolerance of lower spirts lack. I hope you have fun babe. Have an peaceful day! and thanks for the keeping in touch with events.

forward to victory

Nekay says:
funny you should say this...because it's not necessarily about the people attending these events(or the hostess)...if you feel moved to attend..by all means do! don't stop your life because your tolerance level is low. ignornance will always exsist no matter how far you cut your self off...or remove you from certain environments......

i used to be guilty of this, until i learned what patience really was. regardless of anything these are in fact my people...bound by skin tone and blood.....so i' have to be unconditional in all situations. I used to say that I was over shit too....but In that I've removed myself from so many things that I loved. and it all came down to the people...So, I had to ask myself a serious question...Was my life about me or the people around me?

coming where I come from, I think you should be proud of the progress your hometown has built. Not just your hometown, but the state as a whole. Even though people, places, thoughts and things are shady, still shouldn't lose the love.

it's all so cool. so please do you.this is just my opinion.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


i believe this is about how Badu makes people feel (now)...present day.
lol...there are few people that I know who still support this woman. trust this isn't the first email i received back about this particular thing.

so, where did the love go? lol who wants to answer this one....it's time

secret twin::cry for help/answers

i've been spooked!
when was the last time you were spooked by something. whether it was an image, words or just an overall feeling of discomfort.

i have a tendancy to get into crime shows: like City Confidential, Cold Case Files, American Justice, Autopsy....etc. thanks to Mali*smile... tuesday i watched an episode of cold case files, one in particular stuck out "The Secret Twin."

so, i'm watching this story about a young lady raising her 4 kids in brooklyn 1979. it tells the story of how the mother had anger issues and in turn she'd take it out on her children. the age range of the children are the oldest son was 16, she had a daughter that was 8 and a set of twins that were 3(one girl, one boy). she'd beat them every other night for looking wrong. just an overall angry mother living in everyday poverty. you do the math.

the story goes: one morning while all were in the kitchen, the mother's feeding her twins. she's feeding the female twin but for some reason the child didn't want to eat her food. of course the mother starts to force feed the baby until she refuses and the child starts throwing a tantrum. the mother then takes the child out of the high chair and starts to beat her. a 3 year-old child. she solicites her oldest son to help with the beating. two adults beating a 3 year old till she gasped her last breath of life. after realizing that the child wasn't breathing, the mother and son both try to give cpr, but were unsuccessful. as i stated before, all of her children were in the kitchen that morning.

now, after many unsuccessful attempts at reviving life, the mother decides to take her daughters body and wraps it in a trash bag, places the body inside a chest. picture a school trunk that walmart sells at the beginning of the school year. she then places the chest inside the closet.

fast forward, now the youngest twin is 11. with only 3 children alive, the youngest son decides to question his mother about a twin, only after having the seed planted by an aunt he decides to ask not relizing the difficulties ahead. he's been beaten just for questioning about this so called twin.

years later, now as a man, the 23 year old has suffered from haunting images from the past. images he believes have something to do with the alleged twin. they're short flashes of playing inside a babies crib.
he questions his older sister who recalled every moment of that morning. she begins to tell him how her mother and older brother killed his twin. he went to the police after that conversation with information about what he percieved to be a murder of his sister. of course the police were apprehensive because of how long it'd been since. the story had a profound effect on one detective, he decided to do a little research. research turned up with NOTHING. no doctors records, no dental, no school, but what had been found was a certified birth certificate for a LaTanishia Carmichael. records also found that the mother had been receiving social security for this child since she was 1. with these records and a few other things they were able to issue an search warrant on the mothers home. by now at the age of 60, the mother still lives in the same apartment in brooklyn. the police arrive at her door to seach the apartment, sure enough the mumified remains of LaTanishia Carmichael were found, still hidden in the closet of that one bedroom apartment.


what i don't understand is why? the motive was never really presented. the events and story were so eerie till it didn't really matter the motive. what haunted me was the fact that the mother kept this babies body for 23 years in a closet. wouldn't the house smell? wouldn't the building smell of foul? with the son having these visions and not understanding why, i would believe babies soul had been trapped in this apartment all these years and the visions would lead her brother to freeing her.

but it all makes me nervous and i wonder what has gone wrong in the minds of so many mothers in the past 10 years. you have susan yates, the women who drowned all 5 of her babies, there was a recent mexican women in the news last week, whom beheaded all 3 of her children for no reason. i'm not sure what goes wrong in the mind of a mother to make her harm a child that she bared. it saddens me! i feel compelled by these stories of helpless children being murdered. but i'm not sure what i'm supposed to do. not sure of how to lend my hand....i've committed myself to telling these stories to all who'll listen, with hopes of helping someone who's in a similiar situation. maybe that would then lead me to aiding someone.

don't know, i just felt compelled to share.

peace and take care of your families.

the talented 10th speaks

what cosby said

In the presence of NAACP President Kweisi Mfume and other African-American leaders, comedian Bill Cosby took aim at blacks who don't take responsibility for their economic status, blame police for incarcerations and teach their kids poor speaking habits.


Bill Cosby

Cosby made his remarks at a Constitution Hall event in Washington Monday night commemorating the 50th anniversary of the Brown vs. Board of Education decision that paved the way for integrated schools, reported Richard Leiby in his Reliable Source column for the Washington Post.

Leiby said Cosby's remarks were met with "astonishment, laughter and applause."


When Cosby finally concluded, Leiby said, Mfume, Howard University President H. Patrick Swygert and NAACP legal defense fund head Theodore Shaw came to the podium looking "stone-faced."

Shaw told the crowd most people on welfare are not African American. He insisted many of the problems his organization addresses among blacks are not self-inflicted.

Cosby said, according to Leiby: "Ladies and gentlemen, the lower economic people are not holding up their end in this deal. These people are not parenting. They are buying things for kids – $500 sneakers for what? And won't spend $200 for 'Hooked on Phonics.'

He added: "They're standing on the corner and they can't speak English. I can't even talk the way these people talk: 'Why you ain't,' 'Where you is' ... And I blamed the kid until I heard the mother talk. And then I heard the father talk. ... Everybody knows it's important to speak English except these knuckleheads. ... You can't be a doctor with that kind of crap coming out of your mouth!"

The Post said Cosby also targeted imprisoned blacks.

"These are not political criminals," he said. "These are people going around stealing Coca-Cola. People getting shot in the back of the head over a piece of pound cake and then we run out and we are outraged, 'The cops shouldn't have shot him.' What the hell was he doing with the pound cake in his hand?"


my thoughts later on this......

happy birthday!!!

Malcolm X(El-Hajj Malik El Shabazz)

on dead prez: warzone..and the likes

dead prez is working on my nerves...

i really liked these guys after experiencing
let's get free..then from there it went down hill

now-2004 i cop this Pete Rock and i get to Warzone
and this fool says...something something about your
girl in the club..i dont even bring i.d. to the club.
fool what?? how dare you waste a pete rock beat

what cause are these fools fighting for...the right to be as ignorant as possible on tracks? what? how tight i can roll 3 bandanas together? im not understanding...

i can't take these guys serious any longer...it's all a joke to me.

str8 from the email files: FW: DON'T BUY GAS ON MAY 19TH

IT HAS BEEN CALCULATED THAT IF EVERYONE IN THE UNITED STATES DID NOT
PURCHASE A DROP OF GASOLINE FOR ONE DAY AND ALL AT THE SAME TIME, TH! E OIL
COMPANIES WOULD CHOKE ON THEIR STOCKPILES.


AT THE SAME TIME IT WOULD HIT THE ENTIRE INDUSTRY WITH A NET LOSS OF OVER
4.6 BILLION DOLLARS WHICH AFFECTS THE BOTTOM LINES OF THE OIL COMPANIES.


THEREFORE MAY 19TH HAS BEEN FORMALLY DECLARED "STICK IT UP THEIR behind "
DAY AND THE PEOPLE OF THIS NATION SHOULD NOT BUY A SINGLE DROP OF GASOLINE
THAT DAY.


THE ONLY WAY THIS CAN BE DONE IS IF YOU FORWARD THIS E-MAIL TO AS MANY
PEOPLE AS YOU CAN AND AS QUICKLY AS YOU CAN TO GET THE WORD OUT.


WAITING ON THIS ADMIINSTRATION TO STEP IN AND CONTROL THE PRICES IS NOT
GOING TO HAPPEN. WHAT HAPPENED TO THE REDUCTION AND CONTROL IN PRICES THAT
THE ARAB NATIONS PROMISED TWO WEEKS AGO?


REMEMBER ONE THING, NOT ONLY IS THE PRICE OF GASOLINE GOING UP BUT AT THE
SAME TIME AIRLINES ARE FORCED TO RAISE THEIR PRICES, TRUCKING COMPANIES ARE
FORCED TO RAISE THEIR PRICES WHICH EFFECTS PRICES ON EVERYTHING THAT IS
SHIPPED. THINGS LIKE FOOD, CLOTHING, BUILDING MATERIALS, MEDICAL SUPPLIES
ETC. WHO PAYS IN THE END? WE DO!


WE CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE. IF THEY DON'T GET THE MESSAGE AFTER ONE DAY, WE
WILL DO IT AGAIN AND AGAIN.


SO DO YOUR PART AND SPREAD THE WORD. FORWARD THIS EMAIL TO EVERYONE YOU
KNOW. MARK YOUR CALENDARS AND MAKE MAY 19TH A DAY THAT THE CITIZENS OF THE
UNITED STATES SAY "ENOUGH IS ENOUGH"


-----Original Message-----
From: Kenetra Ahlaam
Sent: Monday, May 17, 2004 9:31 AM
To: Tutt, Tiffany
Subject: Re: FW: DON'T BUY GAS ON MAY 19TH


We need to do something because this is OUTRAGEOUS. Didn't we kill all those people in Irag for oil..damn why Bush can't put some out on the streets for us common folk!!!!!

Peace

what i say:
I'm with whatever. we need a plan...i think this will work if enough people adhere to it...i think this would send a message to the gov.
trickle down econ is supposed to pacify us common folk....but you know and i know, that shit has never worked...not even during the drafting of the constitution when trickle down economics was introduced....
the poor will always be that..poor!

hell im still waiting on Bush to acknowledge reparations....he has yet to do that.....he's worried about his pockets....i say bush, cheney,,got damn haliburton can all suck my DICKTRACY!!!

o sorry bout the rant...lol

caught on tape

i'm not sure who follows the news reports..as bogus as the news is.

but in recent news there has been talk about the beheading of one of our soldiers. of course floating around the internet is the "alleged" video of the actual event.

being who i am i opted to click the link to watch what was being taken place. however, i normally post links to everything..but this time i will not post any links to this particular tragedy. why? it goes like this: it had been a long time since i surfed the net, checked out some of my fav forums. well last night i did that. okayplayer being one of my stops...i had an interesting conversation regarding what happened in iraq.

there seems to be mixed views surrounding those who watched the video and those who wouldn't. no i said those who wouldn't not didn't. the argument goes: one side is saying the reason they chose to view the video was out of curiosity and a need to know what exactly goes on in REAL life. opposers said: it was highly disrepectful and those who watched have no respect for that life which was taken away so tragically. added to that- it was also compared to a circus sideshow act: "yes, a man being killed in a rather horrible way" is a curiosity, much like a circus sideshow often referred to in the same way. step right up and take a look through the hole in the wall to see something aMAZing."

this is where i disagreed. i agree that this should not be taken out of context and viewed as some cool stunt installment of faces of death. however, i do think it should be viewed by all "americans." turn on bbc news and your gauranteed to see the same images if not worse ones on regular prime time news. why in america are we so pot bellied and pacified that we deem it immoral to view this particular image? why yes we can sit and watch texas chainsaw massacre(by the way-this really happened in texas) and mock what is happening on screen. why it was okay for old masters to gather round the burning pit or an old tree to watch the good ole lynching of a NIGGA!

so once again AMERICANS are shook by a video. one of which we don't know if it really happened. the same way americans were shook after 911. where you this shook when james byrd was dragged to his death? mind you the james byrd tragedy happened just a few years ago. where you really this shook reading the slave narratives or seeing mass haitians being thrown from ships into the ocean....

i'm saying stop whining and do something about it. if you don't like the way something is going down- spark change! sparking change is not criticizing those with opposite views.

"on another note...i'm not here to justify anything.i watched the video because i felt it necessary
just as if there was a posted link to the actual
resurrection of jesus. i'd watch that too...just to see it
for myself. doesnt mean i lack respect. i simply want to know."

for those who want to know or see i will give info on where to find it but out of repect i will not broadcast that energy on this site. we can verse about it..because i'd like to know where others stand on this issue.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



ah yes, i have been eagerly awaiting this...
...there's some good stuff on this album...

ok

so i'm unsure of what i need to do in order
to not have this wack _ _ _ shifted text on this page.
any insight?

fhuck this i'm going to bed!!!

on some new ish...

surprise, surprise blogger.com has finally done an upgrade.
i'm simply testing that waters here to see if i can like the
new look.

lately i haven't had an urge to write on this blog..maybe i'm
suffering from a loss of words or too much to say that i can't
put it down in word form...not really sure. so i guess i'll just
fool around with the templates.

brb....

semester end: summer begins

it's upsetting when i don't listen to my first mental thought. especially when i feel it in my gut that i'm right about something.

the answer was pluralism and i put permanance...the whole time i kept thinking....the answer is pluralism..i knew this! but instead i did the opposite- i put the wrong damn answer....so there goes my chance at a flawless victory!

as i'm doing cartwheels and summersalts(sp?) leaving my school, it makes me happy to know that i've completed a semester worth of schooling. YIPPIE GOT DAMMIT!!! yesterday i had all my finals...needless to say i did a pretty good job this past semester. nothing too extreme or complicated involving school.

my personal life this semester took many turns and twists. some of which i didn't think i would survive. i've made it through my trials and it feels good to be a good place. i'm not going to get in on the maymester, but i'll probably enroll for the summer in june. for the next couple of days, i'm going to rest. take naps, go to a few shows, hang out with a few people i've blown off this past semester..(hehe)

i'm also embarking on something new...a nonprofit organization to help people of color learn more about creating financial wealth, stability, improving credit and healthy living. more info to come...later. then there's the music i'm working on.....in the spirit of foreign exchange...i've linked with a couple of cats out of state regarding music...been writing and working on a couple of songs for a small compilation project. cool shit is..we will record everything without physically meeting one another...thru internet sources, email and any other method we can find to get this done....also we'll be revamping endaikeio.com........ ! yes, finally! i'm ready for the summer..........

oh, yeah i'll also be purchasing a REAL camera this summer too.....can't wait!


what are you ready for? and what are your summer plans?

pardon me......the werd?

pardon my progress...it's been so long since the last time i spoke here. it shouldn't be too much longer before i'm writing again. change in progress........

in other news....werd on the street was/is:
my man shyne is going to be on def jam. i'm pleased to hear this news...although it concerns me.
i'm concerned...if shyne is coming back to the mic....where will that leave Dy-lan?
will Dy-lan no longer spit anymore "hot fyah"? lol(nigga please)

i took a listen to that reunion joint from slum village. members included: dilla, t3 and elzhi......missing link = baatin. a little sad about baatin....but.....the song is nice....but hey my opinion is bias..i'm a dilla fan!

on the personal:
in the process of moving to a different apartment. let me say this: I HATE MOVING!!! lol who wants to help?

aight...gotta run.
peace

fyeye's...nontheless

bare with me as i ponder a change for my blog....anyone interested in designing please let me know.....
ummm i'm broke so paying you $500 for a blog design is robbery.

hehe.

~!@#$%^&*(

sighs......that's all i have

prayers are answered. wishes come true. if you speak it.........so shall it be

so the time has come....finally! after all of negative energy and talk.....
yes they gave me the axe....the can...the boot(no not the facial expression) but
the let the door knob hit ya.....yada yada.....t-mobile and i have called it quits.
i have no clues as to why i was let go....honestly i don't really give a hoot!
i'm glad that relationship is over- done!
bad part is.........
i'm job
less.
not for too long. who can afford that shit anyway? so i'm searching for employment.
employment with benefits, stable history, room for advancement, 401k, stock options...
yes. you name it. you claim it. and it is/will be mine. got any clues, hookups on work....
holla!

as you can see i'm not bitter about this at all....and for those wondering....
no i didn't have any viloations or write ups, never called in..nothing of that nature.
i was told i wasn't enthusiastic enough.....ha! yeah sure while my mom's in the hospital,
and i'm doing 3 jobs and your paying me for only one....rigggght. your damn right in fact.
i'll never be happy about making you millions- when i can't even put gas in my car.
you got darn right i'm not enthusiastic about this job or you spreading evil rumors about
the godis to the rest of the employees. matter of fact....i'm happy about this separation.
not my situation but our departing.
.......
i mean i actually had to pull out my inner bitch today just to get my last paycheck
out these people. since when does an employer hold your earnings.....for no got damn reason?
i'm sure she'll never do that shit again after that cursing she received from yours truly today.
yes nekaybaaw will get ugly if i'm pushed to an extreme. i've asked for forgiveness.
oh but i ain't forgot bitch! hehe



ok so i needed a laugh.

on other things......ummm when it rains..................
so i'm on the way to get my check and i get stopped by the damn fuzz.
2 tickets today! not one but 2.
grand total $385.
so with no job. how the hell???????
today was one of the worst days i've had since i've been in dallas. but the days ahead will
be brighter i know this.
i felt better once i got to class tonight. discussing buddha...which actually brought
life back to my body. I am ready for the next day.
i am motivated. hope all are as well. if your thinking that your shit is bad....ummmm
just look to me and you'll know that i'm a shitty mess sometimes too....lol

gotta work my mojo!

peace be good people.
stay up

2004 The Year of the Titty: To titty or not to titty? Is that the question

don't laugh i know what your thinking...no this is not a post about
my like or dislike for the titty. hmmm that's another topic.
this post is about the affects of having been graced with a famous titty
on national te-lies-vision. why yes i would be speaking of non other
than ms. jackson.

this is by far the most interesting thing that i've seen in years. not since
the world trade bombing have i been so into news coverage. yes i've
scoured my local tv stations to get as much info about this as possible.
from cnn, msnbc...bet..mtv..you name. whoever has tit coverage i'm on it.
wanna know why? ask me...ask me dammit.

it is proving once again how america has such a disdain for a black woman's
sexual-ness if you will. or display of sexuality. why many already believe that
we are oversexed as a people. but to see the reactions janet's receiving
in regards...is by far the most blatant attempt of finger pointing.
i'm not too sure as to what she's feeling at the moment.
as this was NOT a planned thing...yeah right! lol. whatever the case
janet your stirring a strong emotional brew among the american media.
with the recent coverage of her big bro's struggles...i see this as - adding
that extra spice to that gumbo. noticeable comment:

eclipsedInI
"but it's not just a pound of flesh..."
it's 1 of a black woman's source of life giving & sustenance,
exposed by a young white boy given an honorary soul card.
so it's effects are gonna be morphed by popular media
the real shit i wanna watch is the subconscious shit going on
in popular opinion about black nudity

i sort of agree with this comment. while i've seen hate on the topic,
comments like "well she picked the wrong venue to make a statement",
"it's justin's fault as well as hers"....it's rather funny how we jump
to conclusions as if we were in the room or the on the stage
when this happened. we don't know the intentions.
mtv's saying that this was not planned and it was a mistake...
right....who wants the fcc breathing down their neck? smart move.
but for how long mtv??? while your increased coverage of the titty
blasts on every 10 minutes to the hour...."u heard it here first!!!"

where am i going with this?
by showing flesh to mass numbers of people a black woman
is sort of stigmatized as having iden(tity) loss, or likened to having
all sorts of issues related to not having father figures...while
there's truth to all of these statements. but i am willing to bet my left
titty that this hoopla would not have taken place if it had been madonna.
which happens to be my girl as well...but if you wanna compare...
where's all the hoopla gone with that big ole kiss she hitting christina
and brittney with huh? dead*

i'm going to sit back and watch as america is spoon fed yet one more
thing to start controversy over..media media...instead of looking at real
issues that affect our daily lives...which should be GETTING DUBBYA
OUT OF FUCKING OFFICE.

i'm not asleep you sonsabitches i can see through this. why, use
this as a deterrent from what's going on around us. make us forget
what a real issue is. funny how bbc has coverage of the same
event but in a light hearted way- are paying ms. jackson tribute
as they've been graced with the site of her titty! viva bbc!!!

observe...listen....learn...seek...grow...awaken
the media has you.

titty ram

?who knew? did you know? well now you do......

new shit!! one of my fav groups...i've admired these sista's for sometime.
they're vocal arrangements, abilities, demeanor......u know what this means?
note to all girl groups currently out NOW! upgrade your style EnVouge is back
got dammit......mp3's linked as well.

this was on the hush or something...even i hadn't heard any of this till now..
and i'm elite......hehe!

today's observation

i can't help but to think that beyonce's speechless was written with aaliyah in mind.
i'on't know maybe it's just me..haven't done my resurch on it..but yeah beyonce' I SEE YOU GYAL!!!!!
do your thing...................


i'm

feeling

u/it!