growing painz

one thing that bothers me about people is how selfish we can be about what we want...blinding us from seeing that life really isn't about what "we" want..scenario goes it's about 9:30pm last night I'm laying down sleep I get a phone call..person on the other ends says "hey what you doin", I say "i'm alseep-laying down". caller says, "oh well, girrrrl this party is a trip- and I thought you was coming-and i wanted to see you and I......." so here is when i interrupted in my ok now im pissed because i told yo azz I was sleep tone..."YO I said I was sleep, i'm bout to go peace." the problem I have is this- this particular person does this everytime I say Im busy or I can't talk now. It's as if I never said I was busy because 30 minutes later i
m still on the phone listening to bullshit banter....but I do believe I made my point very clear last night. kinda sad that I would even have to react that way but oh well.

the neediness of attention.
there are some people that require much attention from others. I am one that doesn't require much. But I do understand that attention is healthy. But when it forces one person to compromise everything about themselves then it's wrong! and I don't agree with it. so I take measures into my own hands. after repeated attempts at explaining to this person, that I can NOT offer the things that they need or want--how am I going to get them to see that I aint interested. too much baggage and I don't have the strength to keep this in my cypher. *POOF* 190 proof goes down smooth........
so many of us are needing or searching and we latch on to people and things as crutches. Instead of realizing enough is enough. this is nothing more than another self realization point i've come too. we make ourselves available for people and people feed off of that. sometimes end up missing out or not getting because you have given so much. gotta move past this point-learn the lesson because I dont want to keep repeating the same shit!